THE MAN RULES... Check this out...HILARIOUS, yet so TRUE lol

Live forum: http://forum.freeipodguide.com/viewtopic.php?t=76281

adylisa

25-06-2008 18:49:08

[bda8be51af8]The Man Rulesュュュュュュュュュュュュュュュュュュュ[/bda8be51af8]

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally , the guys' side of the story. ( I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear 'the rules' from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered '1'
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or GOLF

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

LOLOLOLOLOLOL[/sizeda8be51af8]

KeithA

25-06-2008 19:00:56

so true ;-)

adylisa

25-06-2008 19:16:26

lol, i guess it is... ;-)

ilanbg

25-06-2008 19:26:52

Ugh I agree with all many of those.

Except the one for getting in shape... the correct thing to say would have been

"1. I am in shape. [b6cf21db6cb]Get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.[/b6cf21db6cb]"

JennyWren

25-06-2008 19:37:27

Awesome. Those are many of the reasons that I hate a lot of women. WTF is up with girls who go around pouting and then when you ask them what's wrong they are like "I don't want to talk about it". Wth? If you don't want to fess up to your bitchy mood, then pretend everything's ok like the rest of us.

adylisa

25-06-2008 19:50:35

[quote30931c4f75="ilanbg"]Ugh I agree with all many of those.
Except the one for getting in shape... the correct thing to say would have been
"1. I am in shape. [b30931c4f75]Get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.[/b30931c4f75]"[/quote30931c4f75]
LOL... more sandwich... not a bad idea at all... LOL

[quote30931c4f75="JennyWren"]Awesome. Those are many of the reasons that I hate a lot of women. WTF is up with girls who go around pouting and then when you ask them what's wrong they are like "I don't want to talk about it". Wth? If you don't want to fess up to your bitchy mood, then pretend everything's ok like the rest of us.[/quote30931c4f75]
Aww... no need to hate. If women were like men, then there wouldn't be different opinions and no 'debates' LOL... Just the way we are lol Atimes women want attention just like men do, an example is when we say "I don't want to talk about it", we actually really do... LOL...

This Man Rule is more than hilarious... loving the comments... LOL

TravMan162

25-06-2008 19:52:55

I totally agree. Except for talking during commercials. If I'm watching baseball, and you want to talk between innings fine, but if the Sox are on one channel and Sportscenter is my backup, be prepared to not talk to me for three hours. Kthx

adylisa

25-06-2008 19:55:34

Hey Trav... even if it's an emergency?? LOL

TravMan162

25-06-2008 20:07:10

[quoteb6f782f7fa="adylisa"]Hey Trav... even if it's an emergency?? LOL[/quoteb6f782f7fa]

I'm sorry, what? I'm watching sportscenter

adylisa

25-06-2008 20:15:18

[quoted26a6de0f1="TravMan162"][quoted26a6de0f1="adylisa"]Hey Trav... even if it's an emergency?? LOL[/quoted26a6de0f1]
I'm sorry, what? I'm watching sportscenter[/quoted26a6de0f1]
LOLOLOL.. so you'd be choosing sportscenter over your gf/wife... (that's what she will definitely say) - "Choose between me & sportscenter!"... and what will your answer be?... LOL... trying to guess your answer... lol

TryinToGetPaid

26-06-2008 06:29:59

Sportscenter. Everytime.

CollidgeGraduit

26-06-2008 06:34:48

If you love me, you wouldn't make me choose

TryinToGetPaid

26-06-2008 06:44:32

Exactly, and that is why you say anything that is not her....

adylisa

26-06-2008 07:53:42

[quoteb4175e553c="CollidgeGraduit"]If you love me, you wouldn't make me choose[/quoteb4175e553c]
That's for sure... LOLOLOL.. and you have her attention too. LOLOLOL

phriq

26-06-2008 12:44:37

This is so perfect, I already forwarded it to my wife with instructions to take these rules to heart.....Mind there should be an exception for the commercial one. ESPECIALLY! During the Super Bowl....Women, on that yearly event,,,,just dont talk. Nurse your beer and well get back to you after the game.

TravMan162

26-06-2008 13:38:30

[quoteaa85d1cd6c="phriq"]just dont talk. Nurse your beer and well get back to you after the game.[/quoteaa85d1cd6c]

that shit was funny hahahaha. + Karma for you lol

tucker1003

26-06-2008 13:48:22

I found my new commandments for my fiancee.

As far as, "I don't want to talk about it". I will just assume until they do want to talk about it that

A. Its that time of the month, and I don't want to hear about it. or
B. I'm in trouble and need to figure out what I did wrong, which shouldn't be to hard anymore since I can only back track 7 days.

Trav, which Sox are you talkin about?? If white, I'm sorry my Cubbies are rockin!!! If Red, I'm sorry my Cubbies are rockin!!

TravMan162

26-06-2008 13:51:36

RED BABY

Cubbies are indeed rockin' right now. Wow, they're putting together a hell of a season. The question is though, so far it's been a millennium of curse busters. First Red Sox, then White Sox, Then Red Sox again lol is it The Cubbies turn finally? Time will tell, but keep in mind, the NL is a weaker league than the AL. That would be a nice WS though D

phriq

26-06-2008 15:28:32

[quote63be0ab93a="TravMan162"][quote63be0ab93a="phriq"]just dont talk. Nurse your beer and well get back to you after the game.[/quote63be0ab93a]

that shit was funny hahahaha. + Karma for you lol[/quote63be0ab93a]

Haha Thanks man!,,,,i should note too that more so than ANY other TV program...Mythbusters is by far the one she should be most silent onP.

ESMcCready

26-06-2008 17:10:08

Mythbusters rock! I miss watching the episodes. I haven't had access to cable in about 8 or 9 months now.

But I really laughed my ass off at some of these rules. It really is true about some woman.

I especially hate the whole pouty thing. My girlfriend use to do that to me all the time and really get upset with me when I would be like "Ok" and shrug.

55% of women scare me...lihidesli