Stating your Thesis

Live forum: http://forum.freeipodguide.com/viewtopic.php?t=66785

puppeteer

17-07-2007 23:50:45

How would you do it?

I have written 3 essays for my teacher and he always make comments "What is your thesis?"

Should I straight up say "My thesis is Corporation has money that means they have the rights to make a decision" but its awkward

Can you state your thesis in a clever way? without POINTING IT OUT obviously........ like seriously I need help writing an essay

zdub08

18-07-2007 00:02:56

[quoted97d4c5343="puppeteer"]How would you do it?

I have written 3 essays for my teacher and he always make comments "What is your thesis?"

Should I straight up say "My thesis is Corporation has money that means they have the rights to make a decision" but its awkward

Can you state your thesis in a clever way? without POINTING IT OUT obviously........ like seriously I need help writing an essay[/quoted97d4c5343]
maybe you could make it clear by inserting it in its traditional place. usually it is the last sentence of your introduction paragraph. I usually reword it as the first sentence of my conclusion also.

I wouldn't say "my thesis is..." just think of the general point being proven by the information in your paper. that's your thesis.

jdizzle314

18-07-2007 00:05:49

Thesis is a general idea of what w/e is going to be about

zdub08

18-07-2007 00:12:05

http//www.saugatuck.k12.mi.us/para.gif[" alt=""/img6e98f1e004]

ilanbg

18-07-2007 00:55:52

I start my introductions with a bunch of broad, general statements.

For example

"People have tried making money in entrepreneurial ways for hundreds of years. In order to create a lifestyle of wealth and leisure, cleverer ways of making a living for oneself are continually created and sought after. (etc.)"

Then the thesis is a decisive statement that those broad statements relate to. For example

"Freebie sites are a good source of income for those interested in managing their own hours."

Add the thesis statement to the broader statements and you have your introduction. The thesis is more forceful; stated as a fact, not an observation or opinion. But it can also be as intricate or complex as you want—just as long as the last sentence in your introduction is a statement that the rest of your essay supports.

In fact, from the thesis statement alone you should know what the rest of the essay will be about. For example, here are a couple thesis statements I've used in essays

[quote8664d95a6f]However, the fact remains that love, as a non-linear factoid, is not the mystical and enthralling emotion people believe it to be, but rather an evolutionary function designed to better enable our species to survive, as a motivation to nurture our offspring and as a selfish means of boosting our own egos.[/quote8664d95a6f]
[quote8664d95a6f][u8664d95a6f]Lord Of The Flies[/u8664d95a6f], by William Golding, and [u8664d95a6f]I Had Seen Castles[/u8664d95a6f], by Cynthia Rylant, serve to provide examples of situations and circumstances in which a self-serving action compromises an overlaying goal.[/quote8664d95a6f]
[quote8664d95a6f]Upon the use of simple syllogisms and logical deductions, one sees it is impossible to prove why, if at all, poetry is an important art form.[/quote8664d95a6f]

Hope that helps a bit.

Powerbook

18-07-2007 06:20:01

[quote069f404008="ilanbg"]I start my introductions with a bunch of broad, general statements.

For example

"People have tried making money in entrepreneurial ways for hundreds of years. In order to create a lifestyle of wealth and leisure, cleverer ways of making a living for oneself are continually created and sought after. (etc.)"

Then the thesis is a decisive statement that those broad statements relate to. For example

"Freebie sites are a good source of income for those interested in managing their own hours."

Add the thesis statement to the broader statements and you have your introduction. The thesis is more forceful; stated as a fact, not an observation or opinion. But it can also be as intricate or complex as you want—just as long as the last sentence in your introduction is a statement that the rest of your essay supports.

In fact, from the thesis statement alone you should know what the rest of the essay will be about. For example, here are a couple thesis statements I've used in essays

[quote069f404008]However, the fact remains that love, as a non-linear factoid, is not the mystical and enthralling emotion people believe it to be, but rather an evolutionary function designed to better enable our species to survive, as a motivation to nurture our offspring and as a selfish means of boosting our own egos.[/quote069f404008]
[quote069f404008][u069f404008]Lord Of The Flies[/u069f404008], by William Golding, and [u069f404008]I Had Seen Castles[/u069f404008], by Cynthia Rylant, serve to provide examples of situations and circumstances in which a self-serving action compromises an overlaying goal.[/quote069f404008]
[quote069f404008]Upon the use of simple syllogisms and logical deductions, one sees it is impossible to prove why, if at all, poetry is an important art form.[/quote069f404008]

Hope that helps a bit.[/quote069f404008]

ilang is dead on. The thesis is usually placed in the beginning of the intro or even at the end. I wrote an essay with it in the middle once. It really depends on your teacher, but the one I had junior year wanted a thesis with concrete reasons. I asked her why so much info in 1 sentence, and I felt it basically gave away my whole entire paper in that sentence. Turns out that in senior year my teacher felt the same exact way as me, so I went back to my old style. You should really ask your teacher what he or she is looking for.

zdub08

18-07-2007 06:31:51

^the thesis is almost never placed at the beginning of the intro.

tylerc

18-07-2007 06:49:09

The introduction and closing should be like zdub posted.

I always made some bullshit general remark like "Choosing a career has been a life-altering decision since jobs existed", or something stupid like that. Get more specific and segue into your topic, then get more specific into the thesis. Complete opposite for the closer.

AMoore913

18-07-2007 07:41:51

Yeah, I've had problems with this too, but you pretty much just want to sum up your points in 1-2 sentences at the end of the intro. Also, a good lead (first sentence) that will catch the teacher's attention is great, because they'll have read tons of papers and be getting bored. If your lead is really good, it'll give your teacher a very positive view on the rest of your paper, even if you mess up a few times.

Example

"What my friend told me would change my life forever"

instead of

"My friend told me something really cool today"

I know those both suck, but the first one is much more attention grabbing than the first, and it makes you want to know more.

Teachers love that crap.

puppeteer

18-07-2007 11:34:07

i swear this effing prof... is so retarded

i think he wants me to POINT OUT THE OBVIOUS....... like say something MY THESIS is money talks bullshit walks.....

if i dont point it out then i would get a comment saying "What is your thesis????" hes an idiot i swear

zdub08

18-07-2007 11:44:01

another good example
http//70.85.12.163/albino_image03/page2_www.albinoblacksheep.com.jpg[" alt=""/img00497636c2]

rest of the essay can be found here for those who haven't seen it http//www.albinoblacksheep.com/image/essay/1 D

AMoore913

18-07-2007 11:46:21

Well no, I don't think that's it. You should never say that "My thesis is..."

It really is one of the most difficult skills, because sometimes your paper simply isn't just like a typical paper, and it's really difficult to pinpoint exactly what it's about.

So, the thesis should just include the 3 (or more) topics of the body of the paper.

For instance, you said something about corporations having money or something. You would say that, and then give your 3 reasons why, all in the same sentence. That way, the teacher/reader knows what your paper will be about and knows the organization.

zdub08

18-07-2007 11:58:02

it might also help if you write the rest of the paper first, or at least the body paragraphs. then you have a better sense of the main idea of your essay.

theysayjump

18-07-2007 13:09:04

[quotec07f3464cf="puppeteer"]i swear this effing prof... is so retarded

hes an idiot i swear[/quotec07f3464cf]

He's a professor.

You're asking an online forum how to write a Thesis.

http//forum.freeipodguide.com/smilies_mod/upload/38bffac037babfdd251f0f3812a00258.gif[" alt=""/imgc07f3464cf]

Fr1zzank

18-07-2007 13:21:40

If you care, here are some of my thesis statements. Some are kind of weak, I know; I just wasn't into some of the topic material.

"There are a few topics of concern which Spenser uses his two characters to talk about the colonization by the British and the imposition of their laws, the religion of the native Irish, and their ideas for reformation are the three main items of Eudoxus and Irenius, and therein they are the three most principal concerns of Ireland according to Spenser."

"The Apollonian command, the many heinous acts and transgressions of his mother Clytemnestra, and the influence of the Alastor and other supernatural forces all help clarify the righteousness of Orestes actions and his innocence in the matter."

"Three chief examples of how the Great Famine affected the Irish culture can be seen through the devotional revolution, Irish dance, and the ritual of keening."

Since your essay should (typically) have three main arguments, your thesis statement should allude to these statements. Depending on your prof., you can do it rather obviously (my last example).

In looking back on these thesis statements, they're all pretty weak... oh well, I got good marks D

P.S. If that dude on Albino Black Sheep really got a D- for that... then congrats.

theysayjump

18-07-2007 22:50:57

http//forum.freeipodguide.com/viewtopic.php?t=66853