ffactoryxx
08-01-2006 21:23:36
The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian war party.
The Indian Chief proclaims, "So, you are the great Lone Ranger. In honour of the Harvest Festival, you will be executed in three days. But, before I kill you, I will grant you three requests. What is your first request?"
The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse."
The Chief nods and Silver is brought before the Lone Ranger, who whispers in Silver's ear and the horse gallops away. Later that evening, Silver returns with a beautiful blonde woman on his back.
As the Indian Chief watches, the blonde enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night.
The next morning the Indian Chief admits he's impressed. "You have a very fine and loyal horse but I will still kill you in two days. What is your second request?"
The Lone Ranger again asks to speak to his horse. Silver is brought to him, and he again whispers in the horse's ear. As before, Silver takes off across the plains and disappears over the horizon.
Later that evening, to the Chief's surprise, Silver again returns, this time with a brunette, even more attractive than the blonde. She enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night.
The following morning the Indian Chief is again impressed. "You are indeed a man of many talents but I still kill you tomorrow. "What is your last request?"
The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse....alone."
The Chief is curious but he agrees and Silver is brought to the Lone Ranger's tent.
Once they're alone, the Lone Ranger grabs Silver by both ears, looks him square in the eye and says, "Listen very carefully you dumb a$$ horse. For the last time . . . BRING POSSEEEE!!!!"
tylerc
08-01-2006 21:29:13
Made me chuckle, but I've heard better.
whatisntseen
08-01-2006 21:58:14
[quote077469a8a8="theysayjump"]lol[/quote077469a8a8]
D
Berky34
09-01-2006 14:02:05
[quote00047f0a08="EatChex89"]stupid horse[/quote00047f0a08]
lol lol
bruman
09-01-2006 14:05:16
i dont get it... err i do get it.. but what is a pose?
Wolfeman
09-01-2006 14:07:48
posse
noun
Definitions
1. sheriff's helpers especially in the western United States in the 19th-century, a group of citizens assembled by a sheriff to assist in maintaining law and order
2. assembled group a group of people assembled for a common purpose ( informal )
3. U.S. searchers a search party
[Mid-17th century. Shortening of posse comitatus < medieval Latin, "force of the county"]
Or from UrbanDictionary
Your crew, your hommies, a group of friends, people who may or may not have your back
hrdfarkr
09-01-2006 14:15:31
The Lone Ranger and Tonto are riding through the desert. They stop at the little town of Hogwash and the Lone Ranger enters the bar and drinks several beers while Tonto minds the horses.
Six beers later the Ranger re-mounts and they gallop into the desert again. The beer begins to push heavily on the Lone Ranger’s bladder. With a
“Woah!” he reigns in Silver, his trusty steed and dismounts. He walks to a patch of scrub, whips it out and relieves himself.
Unfortunately his relief is short lived for a rattlesnake lives in those bushes and is upset about the new smell. The Lone Ranger is shaking it dry when the rattlesnake decides to enact revenge. It bits our hapless hero right on the tip of his member.
The Lone Ranger is a man of action and common sense. He knows that a hard ride will spread the venom rapidly. He knows he must relax and get help. Immediately he formulates a plan and commands,
“Tonto, you ride like the wind to that town we just passed and fetch the doctor.”
“Yes, Kimo Sabi,” his Indian pal replies, spurs his horse and gallops to the town at breakneck speed.
However, when Tonto arrives in town, the James Gang have recently robbed the only bank and have shot their way out of town, wounding and killing many of the citizens. The good doctor is running from injured to dying, saving those he can. Tonto approaches him and says,
“Good doctor, my Kimo Sabi has been bitten by a rattlesnake. You must come.”
The doctor sighs and tells the Indian,
“I can’t go. I have too much work here but here’s what you do. Take a knife and make an incision at the snake bite. Then suck out the poison.”
Tonto thanks the doctor and speeds out of town and through the desert to where the Lone Ranger sits, beginning to fell the effects of the venom, holding his poisoned member in his trembling hand. He looks at his trusty Indian friend and asks,
“What did the doctor say, Tonto?”
Tonto looks him square in the eye and says,
“Him say, you die!”
Berky34
09-01-2006 14:51:45
lol- ive heard that one before
crazyates
09-01-2006 19:25:50
yep...cept when i heard it it was the a$$....this is funnier.