Berky34
05-09-2005 18:31:12
I understand how Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock and immobilize it? Why the hell can't Paper do this to scissors too?
Screw scissors, why can't Paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/paper/scissors I always choose Rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist
and say, oh shit, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole.
hahhaha i laughed so much when i heard this- post more jokes in this thread!
johnjimjones
05-09-2005 18:37:29
yeah rock > paper, but paper might paper cut someone.
halfbreed
05-09-2005 18:42:49
It's not that funny to me...
[ba41debd829]Famous People Say the Darndest Things[/ba41debd829]
"There are only two reasons to sit in the back row of an airplane Either you have diarrhea, or you're anxious to meet people who do."
Henry Kissinger (former US Secretary of State)
"Things you'll never hear a woman say 'My, what an attractive scrotum!'
Patricia Arquette
"And God said "Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything on Satan."
George Burns
"Luge strategy? Lie flat and try not to die."
Carmen Boyle (Olympic gold medalist in luge, 1966)
"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships."
Sharon Stone
"My girlfriend always laughs during sex-no matter what she's reading."
Steve Jobs (Founder Apple Computers)
"My cousin just died. He was only 19. He got stung by a bee-the natural enemy of a tightrope walker."
Dan Rather (News anchorman)
"I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said, 'Thyroid problem?"
Arnold Schwarzenegger
"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps."
Tiger Woods
"I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in poverty. Actually, I'm more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are apparently doing quite well for themselves."
Jerry Garcia (Grateful Dead)
"I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a Great White or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot."
Axel Rose (Guns'n'Roses)
"Capital punishment turns the state into a murderer. But imprisonment turns the state into a gay dungeon-master."
Rev. Jesse Jackson
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
Jack Nicholson
"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."
Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady)
Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet."
Robin Williams
"Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself."
Roseanne
"In the last couple of weeks I have seen the ads for the Wonder Bra. Is that really a problem in this country? Men not paying enough attention to women's breasts?"
Hugh Grant
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
Dustin Hoffman
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house."
Rod Stewart., aging cover band singer
Berky34
05-09-2005 18:50:30
[quote9fdd0eaf71="halfbreed"] 'My, what an attractive scrotum!'
Patricia Arquette [/quote9fdd0eaf71]
hahahahh thats pretty funnny stuff
Berky34
05-09-2005 18:51:19
[quoted7d35df8e8="Collateral"]jADEM HAS THAT ICON!!![/quoted7d35df8e8]
u mean my cs one? my avatar?
[quote06461985a6="halfbreed"]"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships."
Sharon Stone
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house."
Rod Stewart., aging cover band singer[/quote06461985a6]
lol
J4320
05-09-2005 20:03:22
[quoteb56f20dc57="Berky34"][quoteb56f20dc57="Collateral"]jADEM HAS THAT ICON!!![/quoteb56f20dc57]
u mean my cs one? my avatar?[/quoteb56f20dc57]
No, your joke.
Skeeter
05-09-2005 20:11:39
D D
Funny stuff HalfBreed! Where you find them?
jadem
06-09-2005 04:26:07
[quotef090f768e1="Collateral"]jADEM HAS THAT ICON!!![/quotef090f768e1]
I might have to resurrect it. ;)